Absolutely Feminine
The Jewish Woman’s Path to Love, Happiness and Connection
Chana Deutsch
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Coffee and Connection
241 - Am I making things worse?
November 9th, 2026
241 – Am I making things worse?
When something isn't going well in our marriage, it's so natural to want to fix it. We want to talk about it, explain how we feel, clear up the misunderstanding, and hopefully get to a place where everything feels okay. But have you ever noticed that sometimes, the...
Coffee and Connection is a weekly opportunity to learn actionable and practical solutions to your biggest questions and challenges.
Taking time weekly for yourself, to learn, laugh and connect with a community of women who understand your struggles, is an amazing gift you give to yourself and your relationship.
Knowing you are not alone, and that there are solutions to your frustrations, is validating and empowering!
So, you are invited to grab a cup of coffee (or your beverage of choice!) and begin connecting now…
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Chana Deutsch is a relationship expert and coach. She specializes in helping women in relationships (and not-yet-in relationships) foster the connection, intimacy and love they desire in their marriage and in their home.
Chana teaches down-to-earth strategies designed for women to get in touch with, and bring forth, their authentic and vulnerable feminine self.
By shifting the focus from resentment to empowerment, from control to intimacy, from feminism to femininity, Chana has become the beacon of light for women around the world who want to transform their relationships from a state of disconnect, frustration and lack of understanding to one of mutual respect, happiness, intimate communication and connection.
Chana is the host of the popular With All Your Heart Interview Series and offers varied programs for women to work with her in learning skills and building new patterns and habits for greater connection in their relationships.
What Clients Say
“It’s a liberating, calm, relaxed feeling. It’s about not feeling like I “have” to. Knowing that I have a choice of how to act and then choosing who I want to be in the moment. I feel authentic, real, and comfortable being me. “
Coaching
Testimonials
“I find that getting in touch with my needs and desires is scary. It’s opening up all these painful deep feelings that I was running away from for so long. It’s very intense work being in touch with so much heaviness. But I’m done with feeling stuck and trapped. Those trapped feelings hurt much more. And there’s a certain inner peace that I get after climbing these mountains, that lasts longer and feels better than that fleeting good feeling of being a martyr. Also when I’m in the martyr zone, I feel superficially good but under that layer is resentment and anger and hurt and even jealousy. So I’m learning that choosing the harder path at the moment ultimately feels better.”
“I was nervous about opening up in front of other women, but when I push myself to do so it helps me overall work on my challenge of vulnerability. I’m constantly impressed by others in the group with how much they share and think to myself that I can get there too. They bring up issues that I think address and it’s turned out to be helpful in my life as well. I was nervous I would know someone in the group – and I actually did! It was fine, we got over it. We know intimate details of each other which can be helpful because we know someone else live-in person also working on their marriage in a real way or we choose to not talk about it with each other and just know we shared a special experience. You also don’t need to read and listen to everyone else’s messages if you think you’re not interested or are short on time (I’ve skipped a few myself) and you will still gain from group coaching as you can choose to read and listen to all Chana’s responses.”
Hi Chana, BH went great last night. My husband came home and I wasn’t ready. At all. My son was in the middle of sponga. Usually my husband was very tense before Bedikat chometz. Its important for him to start on time straight after maariv.
But he just waited patiently until I was ready. Didn’t get at all frustrated. A complete miracle.
It took a long time to check the house and at the end he simply said, “This is how I wanted the house to look before Bedikat chometz.” No anger or frustration.
I answered, “I know, so would I.” For the first time ever I felt like we prepared for Pesach together. Both sharing the burden. We laughed a lot together… I just wanted to thank you for the program. It is really life changing amazing to see the changes in myself and my marriage..
I am taking today, one job at a time. It’s great to have no list of things I have to do. I am just choosing randomly according to my mood trying to just BE.
Have a wonderful yom tov.”Later we were hangin out briefly. He was soooo patient, tolerant and kind (very unusual) that I spontaneously hugged him tightly. I felt so much warmth and support, which is soooooo rare.
We were both shocked. I asked him “when has this ever happened before?” He said I don’t think EVER!! That is true. From beginning of our marriage, things flopped. We were not able to build a foundation for 30 years!!!!!! This is truly a miracle. I never imagined this could happen. Thank u, Chana and Hashem, for guiding me and giving me the “will” to do this work!”
“I’m so grateful to Chana for the Absolutely Feminine program! It is the best investment I have ever made!! I’m not the same person that I was before.
My marriage is in a better place than it’s ever been!
I have more confidence now, more clarity, and more peace of mind in general, knowing that I’m trying my best and my best is awesome. Thank you Chana this amazing gift!! <3 <3 <3″
“I need to share this magical moment.
My husband came home with a shopping bag and said “____ I got you something special. Just because.” (He bought me a danish)
I’m blown away that by believing that he loves me, maybe that made space for him to able to show it to me.
I don’t remember him saying such words before.”
“I’m very private person by nature. I don’t overshare amongst friends or family. I was nervous about joining the group coaching because of this. It took me two days to feel safe enough to share on this forum. After a couple days, I loved the feeling that I had knowing that I was a part of a team. It’s been the most amazing experience. What I love most about the group coaching is when someone brings up a subject that I can totally relate to yet I never thought to bring up or ask about. <3 <3”
“Later we were hangin out briefly. He was soooo patient, tolerant and kind (very unusual) that I spontaneously hugged him tightly. I felt so much warmth and support, which is soooooo rare.
We were both shocked. I asked him “when has this ever happened before?” He said I don’t think EVER!! That is true. From beginning of our marriage, things flopped. We were not able to build a foundation for 30 years!!!!!! This is truly a miracle. I never imagined this could happen. Thank u, Chana and Hashem, for guiding me and giving me the “will” to do this work!”
“I heard about Chana through the WAYHs interviews, and I loved her style. She didn’t give bandaid solutions like the therapists I’ve been to before. She dives deep to help us find ourselves, our limiting beliefs and fears and she works with us individually, to help us rewrite our stories into new truths, which helps us move fwd in marriage and in life.
I was very hesitant to join a group program because I was afraid of exposing myself in such a setting.
Interestingly, what I found was that being in a group setting, provided so much more validation and support, than what I would have gotten from one on one relationship with a coach.
Also I didn’t have the guts to bring up certain topics, and when I saw other women posting their struggles in that area it helped me realize that I’m normal for having those issues, and I’m not the only one in the universe struggling with it. And I was able to get coached along with those women as Chana was coaching them.
Another benefit is that some women have a similar personality to my husband, so through their questions, it helped me understand my husbands way of thinking better.
Also, seeing others victories is a huge motivator. It gives me the fuel to keep trying, keep pushing past my fears.
We also have the option of sending Chana a private whatsapp when we feel a topic is too personal, and she responds and supports us in private.
I found that this setup is a win win. I get the pros of a group setting and the pros of a private setting.<3 <3″
“Thank you so much for everything! 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊 I appreciate you every single day. Today when someone said that she doesn’t hear the class often enough to keep this in her mind, I literally though to myself I hear you everytime I sit down. I just play one 2 ½ minute message and it makes me fly for the next hour.”
“I am in the second year of Chana’s Absolutely Feminine program and I love the group coaching experience. It’s really special to come together with a group of women and work both together and individually to improve our relationships. The insight into the other women’s lives and challenges makes me feel less alone in struggles I have and more capable of overcoming them. The women in my group are kind and accepting and we have grown to feel comfortable with sharing the most vulnerable things because we know they will receive by the other women with respect and empathy. One of my favorite parts of group coaching is that you can learn so many more skills than if you were being coached along, since you get coached on get coached on both your own stuff and the questions the other women ask as well. You also grow to become close knit in the sense that even though you maintain basic privacy and you might not ever actually hang out, you come to care for each other’s difficulties. It’s really special to have a group to share your heart and soul with love and care, and that Chana, who is so warm and relatable, will be there to help you with whatever you are going through.”
“Thought I’d share something funny. Shabbos night I was having a dream and there was something my husband did that I was bothered by and in my dream I remember myself thinking I really need to ask this group Then when I woke up and was laughing at myself that it was a dream. But its amazing how the group is (such a big) part of my life 😀
I found this group to be safe, loving, accepting, supportive environment to share my true thoughts, feelings, and desires. Doing so helped me feel more accepting, loving and respect of myself and all the other people in my life. Absolutely feminine is an absolutely loving, nurturing, and inspiring place. Each woman taught me invaluable, priceless lessons and motivated me to be a better me.”
To contact Chana, you can email her at chana@absolutelyfeminine.com, or click bellow to book a time to speak with her. Married and single women are welcomed!